Tag: planning

I’m Not the Mom I Thought I’d Be — And That’s Okay

by Mothersense, posted in Mental Health Recovery, Reclamation, This Life



When I first became a mom, I had ideas.

Not just little ones, but full pictures in my head of how life would look.

What kind of mom I would be.
What kind of home I would create.
Who my kids would grow up to become.

I did not think of it as expectations at the time.
It felt more like hope.

I wanted a doctor.
Two nurses.
A veterinarian.

I wanted stability for them.
Security.
A life that felt a little more certain than the one I had known.

And I worked hard toward that in my own way.
Raising them.
Showing up.
Trying to guide them toward what I thought would give them the best future.

But life does not follow the plans we make in our heads.

And kids are not meant to become our plans.

They are meant to become themselves.

Somewhere along the way, I had to face a quiet truth.

My kids are not who I once imagined they would be.

They are not following the paths I pictured.
They are not fitting into the neat little futures I had hoped for.

And for a moment, that felt like loss.

Not because there is anything wrong with them.
But because I had to let go of the version of their lives that existed in my mind.

That is a hard thing to admit.

As parents, we do not like to say that part out loud.

But here is what I know now.

My kids are good people.

They are strong in ways that do not show up on paper.
They are learning, growing, struggling, and figuring life out in real time.

And they still call me.

When things get hard.
When they need advice.
When they just need someone to listen.

That means something.

Maybe everything.

Because at the end of the day, that was always the goal, even if I did not realize it at the time.

Not perfection.
Not a specific career path.
Not a life that looks impressive from the outside.

But connection.

Trust.

A relationship that lasts beyond childhood.

I am not the mom I thought I would be either.

I have changed.
Life has changed me.

There are things I would do differently if I could go back.
There are things I have had to learn the hard way.

And there are moments where I have questioned myself more than I ever expected to.

But I am still here.

Still showing up.
Still loving them the best way I know how.
Still learning alongside them instead of trying to control the outcome.

And maybe that is what motherhood really is.

Not raising perfect kids.
Not following a perfect plan.

But walking beside imperfect humans as they figure out who they are.

And learning to let them.

So no, my life does not look like I thought it would.

My kids are not who I once imagined.

And I am not the mom I expected to be.

But we are real.

We are connected.

We are still choosing each other, over and over again.

And that is more than enough.

The GoFundMe Is Not a Life Insurance Policy

by Mothersense, posted in financial-planning


I shared it without thinking twice. A GFM for my former father-in- law, and then, a friend of a friend. A family I didn’t know personally but recognized in the way you recognize anyone who looks like people you love. The photo was from a better day — a birthday, maybe, or a holiday. Everyone smiling. No one knowing what was coming.
I hit share. I donated what I could. I scrolled on.
And then I sat with it.
Because here’s the thing nobody says out loud when those posts go around:
A GoFundMe is not a plan. It’s what happens when there wasn’t one.
I’ve been in this industry long enough to know what the aftermath looks like. Not the GoFundMe stage — the stage after that. When the campaign closes. When the casseroles stop coming. When the world moves on and that family is still sitting inside a life that financially collapsed overnight.
The mortgage didn’t pause for grief.
The utility companies didn’t send condolences.
The kids still needed things.
And the person who held it all together was gone.
That’s the part that doesn’t make it into the fundraiser description. The slow, grinding weight of trying to rebuild a life when the foundation was pulled out from under you — with no parachute, no cushion, nothing but the kindness of strangers and a Donate button.
I’m not here to scare you. I’m here because I’ve had the hard conversations — the ones that happen after it’s too late to do anything about it — and I would rather have an uncomfortable conversation with you now than a heartbreaking one later.
This is what I do. Not because it’s a job, but because it matters in a way that is genuinely hard to explain until you’ve watched a family try to survive without it.
There is a solution for where you are right now — whatever your budget, whatever your stage of life:
Mortgage Protection — so your family keeps the roof over their heads, no matter what happens to you.
Final Expense Coverage — so the people grieving you aren’t also drowning in bills they didn’t see coming.
Living Benefits — so a diagnosis doesn’t also become a financial crisis while you’re still here fighting.
You don’t have to have it all figured out. You just have to start.
If you’re in Texas, I’d love to sit down with you and find something that actually fits your life and your budget — no pressure, no jargon, just an honest conversation.
If you’re outside of Texas, I have trusted colleagues across the country and I will personally make sure you’re connected to someone who will take care of you.
Your family deserves more than a Donate button.
Let’s build something that holds.
Drop a comment or send me a message. Let’s talk

Julie.kilcrease.insurance@gmail.com

Dinner Conversations We Avoid, But shouldn’t

Featured by Mothersense, posted in financial-planning, This Life

The Dinner Table Conversation We Avoid… But Shouldn’t
There’s something sacred about the dinner table.
It’s where backpacks get unpacked, where stories spill out about teachers and tests, where we remind our kids to eat their vegetables and ask about their day. It’s where life happens. Messy, loud, beautiful life.
Between the “Did you finish your homework?” and “Don’t forget practice tomorrow,” we’re building something bigger than routines. We’re building a sense of safety.


But here’s a question most of us never ask in those moments:
What would happen to all of this if I wasn’t here tomorrow?


Peace of Mind Isn’t Just a Feeling. It’s a Plan.
We spend so much time protecting our families in everyday ways. Locking doors, checking grades, making sure everyone gets where they need to be.


But real peace of mind comes from knowing your family wouldn’t be left overwhelmed, confused, or struggling to pick up the pieces if the unthinkable happened.
Grief is hard enough without paperwork, court dates, and unanswered questions.


A Conversation I’ve Already Started
I’ll be honest. I’ve had these conversations with my family.
I have a document ready with all my important logins and passwords, and I keep it updated regularly. Someone knows where it is. That matters more than people realize.
I’ve talked through the hard things with my husband and my older kids. Not because I want to, but because I need to.
And yes, sometimes it gets uncomfortable.


Like when I told my kids I changed my mind about insisting on cremation. I told them, “Do what you guys want.” There are five of them, so good luck with that decision.
But I did give them one non negotiable.
At whatever kind of gathering they have for me, they must play “Good Riddance (Time of Your Life).” (They don’t need to know how it ties back to an episode of ER I watched with my mom that left us both bawling.)


My youngest gets so uncomfortable every time I bring it up. He tells me, “Mom, tell the others, not me.”


Oh, I do.


I tell all of them. Often enough to make sure they know.
Because As Much As It Sucks, It’s Necessary
I know this isn’t a fun topic.
It sucks.
But it is necessary.
If I leave this world suddenly, I don’t want my family sitting around asking:


What do we do now?


Where is everything?


What would she have wanted?


I cannot be here forever with them.
But I can guide them through these choices now.
We all die. That is the truth no one likes to say out loud.
But I can ease some of the frustration, some of the confusion, and even a little of the pain that comes after.


The Reality Most Families Aren’t Prepared For:

Without preparation, families are left trying to figure everything out while grieving:


Where are the bank accounts?
Who gets access to what?
What were the wishes?
How do they even begin?


If things are not set up properly, it can all end up in probate. This is a long, expensive, and emotionally draining process.
And it does not have to be that way.
Simple Steps That Change Everything


This is not about fear. It is about love. These are simple, practical ways to protect your family:


✔️ Financial Protection
Have life insurance or burial coverage
Consider prepaid funeral plans
✔️ Direct Beneficiaries
Make sure all bank accounts have designated beneficiaries
This allows access with just an ID and death certificate
✔️ Protect Your Home


File a Transfer on Death (TOD) deed


This helps your home pass directly to your chosen person without probate
The Documents That Speak for You When You Can’t
Putting your wishes in writing is one of the greatest gifts you can leave behind:

  • Living Will outlines your healthcare wishes
  • Durable Power of Attorney handles legal decisions
  • Healthcare Power of Attorney handles medical decisions
  • Last Will and Testament determines who receives your belongings
  • Funeral Planning Declaration states your final wishes
  • These do not have to be complicated. They just need to clearly reflect your wishes.


Make It Easy for the People You Love
One of the most overlooked steps is also one of the most important.
Create a master list of:

  • Bank accounts
  • Investments
  • Credit cards
  • Bills and utilities


Make sure someone knows:
Where your life insurance policies are
Where to find titles for vehicles and property
How to access your accounts and passwords


Because in today’s world, access is everything.


The Conversation That Matters Most


Talk to your family.
Even when it feels awkward.
Even when they do not want to hear it.
Tell them your wishes. Explain your decisions. Let them ask questions.
What feels uncomfortable now becomes clarity later.
It’s Not About the End. It’s About Love.
We cannot control what happens tomorrow.
But we can control how prepared we are today.
So maybe tonight, between dinner and dishes, you start a different kind of conversation.
Not a scary one.
A loving one.
Because true peace of mind is not just knowing your family is okay today.
It is knowing they will be okay no matter what.

Love and light! 😉

Legacy planning
Debt help

Who is next?

by Mothersense, posted in This Life

The Importance of Learning Personal Finance: Protecting Your Future, Today

As I navigate the world of business and finance, I’ve come to understand a crucial truth: while we are all taught to know our bank balances, we often neglect to consider how we will secure our financial futures in the event of the unexpected. In my journey, both personally and professionally, I’ve experienced the sting of loss far too many times, and it’s brought me to a pivotal realization—financial literacy isn’t just about knowing how to budget, it’s about preparing for the unknowns of life and ensuring that our loved ones are protected no matter what.

In recent years, I’ve lost people close to me, people who had no idea their time on Earth was so limited. The shock of their sudden departures forced me to confront a painful truth: we always know how much money is in our bank accounts, but we never know how much time we have left.

Through these experiences, I’ve learned just how important it is to not only know how to manage your money today, but how to make it work for you tomorrow. It’s not enough to simply save or budget; you need to understand how life insurance, investing, and asset protection can ensure your family’s financial security if you’re not around to provide for them.

The Need for Personal Finance Education

When we think of personal finance, the first thing that usually comes to mind is budgeting. While budgeting is undoubtedly important, it’s only one piece of the puzzle. Understanding how to protect and grow your wealth is just as critical, if not more so, especially in an uncertain world where anything can change in the blink of an eye.

Life Insurance: Protecting Those Who Matter Most

A few of years ago and again this year, I lost friends unexpectedly. Middle aged, full of life, and with a bright future ahead. The sudden passing left the families reeling, both emotionally and financially. They had no life insurance in place, no financial safety net to cushion the blow of losing their income.

These events profoundly impacted me, and it sparked a deeper desire to learn about planning for the future, including life insurance—something I’d previously taken for granted. As I delved deeper into the field, this year I decided to become licensed to sell life insurance and realized just how vital it is to have coverage in place, no matter how young or healthy you are. Life insurance doesn’t just offer peace of mind; it’s a lifeline for your family in the face of tragedy. If the worst happens, your policy can cover funeral costs, replace lost income, pay off debts, and provide financial stability during an incredibly difficult time.

The lesson here is clear: you may be able to control your budget and expenses, but you can’t control the future. Life insurance gives you the power to ensure that those you love are not left in a financial struggle should something happen to you.

Investing: Making Your Money Work for You

Another eye-opening lesson I learned was the power of investing. In the wake of losing friends and family members, I started questioning how I was preparing for my own future. While I had saved money and kept a budget, I realized I wasn’t growing my wealth as effectively as I could have been.

Investing isn’t just for the wealthy—it’s for anyone who wants to make their money work for them. Whether through stocks, real estate, or other opportunities, investing allows your money to grow exponentially over time. Compound interest is one of the most powerful forces in wealth-building, but it requires a long-term mindset.

When you invest, you’re setting yourself up for financial freedom and security. You’re working to create multiple streams of income that will carry you through not just your retirement years, but also any unexpected life events that might arise along the way.

Asset Protection: Securing What You’ve Built

Building wealth is one thing, but protecting that wealth is just as important. Whether it’s from potential lawsuits, creditors, or even unforeseen natural disasters, protecting your assets ensures that everything you’ve worked for doesn’t slip through your fingers due to factors beyond your control.

Consider estate planning, business insurance, and strategies like setting up trusts. These tools help ensure that your assets—whether it’s a home, a business, or investments—are safeguarded and passed on according to your wishes. I’ve seen firsthand how a lack of preparation in this area can lead to unnecessary hardship for family members left behind.

Why I’m Committed to Financial Literacy

As I’m working towards my financial licenses, I see my role not just as a professional in the industry, but as an advocate for financial literacy. Through my personal losses and the lessons I’ve learned, I want to help others take proactive steps to secure their futures. If I can help even one person understand the importance of investing in life insurance, taking control of their financial future, or protecting their assets, then it’s worth it.

Learning personal finance isn’t just about protecting your own future; it’s about ensuring that your loved ones can continue to thrive after you’re gone. You can’t predict what tomorrow will bring, but you can prepare for it. Whether it’s having the right insurance policies in place, investing to build wealth over time, or taking steps to safeguard your assets, personal finance gives you the tools to take control of your financial destiny.

NEXT STEPS: Take Action Today

We all face uncertainty. Life has a way of throwing us curveballs that we can’t predict or prepare for. But through personal finance—through learning about life insurance, investing, and asset protection—we can create a safety net that ensures our loved ones are taken care of when we’re no longer able to provide for them.

Don’t wait for tragedy to strike before you start thinking about your financial future. Start today. If you’re like me, and you’ve seen the devastating impact of sudden loss, use that as motivation to protect yourself, your family, and your wealth. Life may be unpredictable, but with the right financial tools in place, you can ensure that your legacy endures, no matter what.