Tag: empathy

The Letter L: Lessons, Layers, and the Beauty of Letting Go

by Mothersense, posted in Mental Health Recovery, Reclamation


Today marks a fresh page in the notebook. If you caught my post Saturday August 1,  on A New Beginning, you know we are stepping into this season with fresh intention, a clean slate, and a willingness to embrace where we are right now.
As we keep moving through our alphabetical journey, we’ve arrived at L. And honestly? It couldn’t have come at a better time. Life isn’t linear—it’s full of turns, unexpected shifts, and quiet victories. Today, we’re unpacking three “L” words that help us make sense of the journey and keep us grounded as we build what’s next.
1. Lessons (The Gold in the Grit)
Every season leaves behind a trail of wisdom—if we’re willing to look for it. The hard days, the messy kitchen tables, the pivots in our plans, and the unexpected delays aren’t waste; they are curriculum.
When we look back on where we’ve been, the goal isn’t to linger on what went wrong, but to gather up the lessons. What did that challenging week teach you about your boundaries? What did that creative block teach you about rest? When you view every outcome as information rather than failure, suddenly nothing is lost. Everything becomes fuel for where you’re going next.
Takeaway: Don’t regret the detours. Write down the lesson, keep the wisdom, and drop the weight.
2. Layers (Embracing Your Multitudes)
None of us are just one thing. You aren’t just defined by your day job, your family role, your creative side projects, or your past. You are a collection of layers built over time.
Sometimes we feel pulled in a dozen directions because we carry so many different passions and responsibilities. But here’s the beauty of layers: they give you depth. The patience you practice in one area of your life feeds into your creative work. The organizational systems you build for your home give you the freedom to dream bigger. Embrace all the different titles and talents you carry—they don’t make you scattered; they make you whole.
Takeaway: You don’t have to fit into a single box. Give yourself permission to honor every layer of who you are today.
3. Letting Go (Making Room for the New)
You can’t start a new chapter if you’re still holding onto the clutter of the last one. Whether it’s physical space, old expectations, or the pressure to have everything figured out by Monday morning, letting go is the ultimate act of trust.
As we launch into this new season, take a look around your desk, your calendar, and your mind. What are you holding onto simply out of habit? What mental tabs can you close today? When you clear out what isn’t serving your current season, you create the quiet space needed for new ideas, new energy, and new peace to settle in.
Takeaway: Hands that are full of old clutter can’t reach for new blessings. Open your hands and let it go.
Bringing It Home Today
As you move through this weekend, take a quiet moment over your morning coffee or evening wind-down to ask yourself:
What lesson am I carrying forward into this new start?
What layer of myself have I been neglecting lately?
What space do I need to clear out to make room for what’s next?
Here’s to living intentionally, learning as we go, and giving ourselves grace for the journey.

Speaking from Experience

by Mothersense, posted in Mental Health Recovery, Reclamation

Life is Too Short for “Later”

I was looking back at a post I wrote during one of the hardest pivots of my life – the end of my marriage. At the time, I realized I couldn’t keep distracting myself with projects. I had to face the “down and dirty” reality so that my children and I could move forward.
Looking back, that season wasn’t just about ending a marriage; it was about beginning a life where I took control of my own security.
The Archive :

I am divorcing my disabled husband. It’s not what you think, the difficulties were there for years and we refused to face them. In order to move forward for myself and my children I did have to face them. I had to be ok both physically and emotionally. No more throwing myself into a project or spending hours away from the issues. 

So I sat down with my husband and we had a very difficult discussion. It took time for it all to sink in with him but we agree for the most part. Our marriage is over, it has been for a few years. We were making one another miserable and we had tried counseling, techniques, but the reality was: it was over. Without hashing out the down and dirty we are both dealing with it all in our own way. The kids are adjusting. I hope he finds a way to heal himself and be a good dad. I hope my children will one day understand that I never once made this decision lightly. It took me years to gather the courage to speak the words “I want a divorce”

Now we deal with making arrangemnets and  adjustments for different things. Ex and oldest daughter are living in a different state. Oldest son is living with his new wife as of March. I have DD2 and DD3 as well as Baby boy at home with me and my new man. (That is a tale for another day) and we are doing well. 

Love and light folks!! Life is just too darn short! 


The 2026 Pivot :
When I say “Life is too darn short,” I mean it. But I also know that when life changes—when we divorce, move states, or merge families with a “new man”—our protection needs to change with us.
When I went through my divorce, I had to learn the hard way about making arrangements, updating bank accounts, and checking beneficiaries. I became an agent because I don’t want anyone else to navigate those “adjustments” alone or unprotected.
Are Your “Arrangements” Up to Date?
If you’ve gone through a divorce, a move, or a family change, your old insurance policy might still be protecting a reality that no longer exists. Let’s make sure your children are the ones who are actually set up for the future.

Update your Legacy plans


Julie Kilcrease
Licensed Life Insurance Agent | Texas
NPN: 21375920
Helping you protect the life you’ve worked so hard to build.

Mom Burnout Doesn’t Always Look Like Breaking Down

by Mothersense, posted in Mental Health Recovery, Reclamation



When people talk about burnout, they usually picture someone falling apart.

Crying.
Snapping.
Completely overwhelmed and unable to keep going.

And sometimes it does look like that.

But sometimes it doesn’t.

Sometimes burnout is quiet.

It looks like getting up every day and doing exactly what needs to be done, but feeling nothing while you do it.
It looks like checking the boxes, answering the calls, making the meals, showing up for everyone… and still feeling like you are not really there.

Not sad enough to fall apart.
Not okay enough to feel at peace.

Just somewhere in the middle.

Stuck.

I think that version of burnout is harder to recognize, because from the outside, everything looks fine.

You are still functioning.
The house is still running.
The kids are still cared for.
Life is still moving forward.

But inside, something feels off.

You are tired in a way that sleep does not fix.
You are overwhelmed in a way that is hard to explain.
You are needed constantly, and somehow still feel invisible.

And then comes the guilt.

Because how do you admit you are burned out when you are still doing everything you are supposed to do?

How do you say you are struggling when nothing is technically falling apart?

So you don’t.

You push it down.
You tell yourself other people have it harder.
You remind yourself to be grateful.

And you keep going.

That is what a lot of mom burnout actually looks like.

It is not always a breaking point.

Sometimes it is a slow fading.

A quiet losing of yourself in the middle of taking care of everyone else.

A life that starts to feel more like responsibility than something you are living.

And the hardest part is, you can stay there for a long time.

Because nothing forces you to stop.

There is no clear moment where everything crashes and demands your attention.

There is just that quiet voice in the back of your mind that says, something is not right.

If you are in that place, I want you to hear this.

You do not have to fall apart for your burnout to be real.

You do not have to earn rest by reaching a breaking point.

You are allowed to acknowledge that you are tired.
You are allowed to admit that something feels off.
You are allowed to need more than just getting through the day.

Not every season is meant to feel full and meaningful and balanced.

Some seasons are heavy.

But you are still in there somewhere.

Even if you feel a little disconnected.
Even if you are just going through the motions right now.

This is not the end of you.

It is a signal.

A quiet one, maybe.
But an important one.

And maybe the next step is not fixing everything all at once.

Maybe it is just noticing.

Maybe it is just being honest with yourself.

Maybe it is just giving yourself permission to say, this is harder than I thought it would be.

That matters.

More than you think.

Spring Cleaning….House and Mind

by Mothersense, posted in This Life

Spring Cleaning Your Mind (And Your Stuff)


Spring equinox is here, and yes—it’s that magical time when the world starts fresh, the days get longer, and everything feels like it could use a good tidy. But here’s the thing: spring cleaning isn’t just for closets. It’s for your mind, your energy, your thoughts… and yes, even your memories.
I know, I know. Some of you are already feeling that panic: “Wait, if I let go of that hoodie, that memory disappears!” To my neurospicy friends—you KNOW exactly what I mean. The texture, the smell, the little stitch that makes you remember… it’s sticky. It feels like letting go of the thing is letting go of the story.
But here’s the truth: it’s not real. Memories live in your brain, your heart, and your soul—they don’t live in the item itself. You can absolutely keep the memory without keeping the clutter. That hoodie? The shoes? The ticket stub? They’re props. You’re the star of the story, not the accessory.
Why Letting Go Feels Hard
Objects, habits, even old thoughts—they cling. We hold onto them because they’re familiar, because they make us feel safe, or because our brain just really likes a good story. But here’s the catch: cluttered spaces, whether physical or mental, make it harder to breathe, to think, to be fully present.
Your Step-by-Step Mental Spring Cleaning
Pick a zone – Closet? Phone? Thoughts that keep looping? Start somewhere small.
Ask yourself – Does this serve me? Or am I holding it out of habit, guilt, or fear?
Let it go – Donate, recycle, delete, journal about it, take a picture… whatever makes it safe to release.
Celebrate the space – Notice how your energy shifts when there’s breathing room.
Reclaim & Renew
Letting go isn’t losing—it’s reclaiming. It’s saying, “I honor my memories, and I honor myself by making space for joy, growth, and intention.” That’s reclamation. That’s renewal. That’s you stepping into a season where you aren’t weighed down by what no longer serves you.
So here’s your challenge for the equinox: pick one thing today—a hoodie, a thought, a habit—and let it go. Notice the difference it makes when you reclaim that space for yourself.
Because spring isn’t just about cleaning the house—it’s about cleaning your mind, your heart, and your life. And yes… you can absolutely keep the memories without keeping the clutter.

A is for Addiction

by Mothersense, posted in Mental Health Recovery, Reclamation

Addiction.


Just sit with that word for a moment.
It carries weight. It sounds heavy. Shame-filled. Final. I can’t think of many positive things we associate with it.
I personally smoke cigarettes (working toward quitting), and I am absolutely a caffeine addict — and probably sugar too. But beyond my own habits, I have loved addicts. Not just romantically. Friends. Family. People I would go to the ends of the earth for.


So let’s ask the question plainly:
Is addiction a disease? A condition to be treated? Something recovery is possible from?
Yeah. Yes. It is.


What Is Addiction?
The American Society of Addiction Medicine defines addiction as:
A treatable, chronic medical disease involving complex interactions among brain circuits, genetics, the environment, and an individual’s life experiences. People with addiction use substances or engage in behaviors that become compulsive and often continue despite harmful consequences.


The National Institute on Drug Abuse explains it similarly — addiction is a chronic, relapsing disorder characterized by compulsive drug seeking and use despite negative consequences.
Chronic.
Medical.
Treatable.


Those words matter.


And here’s something else that matters:


In the United States, about 1 in 6 people struggle with a substance use disorder each year.
Millions more struggle with nicotine dependence.
Caffeine dependence is widely recognized.
Studies show that highly processed foods can trigger brain reward systems in ways similar to addictive substances.
This isn’t rare. This isn’t “those people.” This is us. Our neighbors. Our families.


We Joke About It… But Should We?
People casually say, “I’m a coffee addict.”
Or “I’m addicted to Diet Coke.”
Or “Don’t talk to me before my sugar.”
But do we understand the weight of that word?


Yes — you really can be addicted to sugar, caffeine, nicotine, and highly processed foods. That doesn’t make you weak. It makes you human with a brain wired for reward.
Our brains are designed to remember what feels good and to repeat it. Dopamine — the “feel good” neurotransmitter — reinforces behaviors that provide pleasure or relief. Over time, repetition becomes reliance. Reliance becomes dependence.
And dependence, when disrupted, becomes withdrawal.


The Logan Story
Let me tell you a story.
Logan was 10. His mom wasn’t much of a cook, so meals were mostly pre-packaged, fast food, convenient — and let me say clearly: fed is fed. No judgment. Survival comes first.
But when summer came, Logan went to stay with Dad and stepmom. They cooked fresh food. Fruits. Vegetables. Homemade meals. Grilled burgers and hot dogs.
Within days, Logan had what looked like the flu. Headaches. Fatigue. Irritability. Just not himself.
His big sister picked him up, took him to the movies and — yes — McDonald’s.
Miraculous recovery.
Until a week later, when the “flu” returned.
He wasn’t sick. He was withdrawing.
His body had become accustomed to high levels of sugar, sodium, and processed additives. When they disappeared, his system reacted.
Dad refused to reintroduce the fast food. They let his body recalibrate. It was uncomfortable. It was eye-opening. And it was very real.
Logan didn’t know he was dependent.
But his body did.


It’s All the Same Brain
Opioids.
Nicotine.
Methamphetamine.
Alcohol.
Sugar.
Caffeine.


Different substances. Same reward circuitry.
When we remove what the brain has grown used to, the body protests.


Withdrawal can look like:
Headaches
Fatigue
Anxiety
Irritability
Nausea
Depression
Physical pain


Some withdrawals are uncomfortable. Some are dangerous. Some are life-threatening.
But the mechanism? The brain wanting what it has been trained to expect.


So Where Do We Start?


We start by naming it.


Without shame.


We stop whispering about addiction like it’s a moral failure. We stop labeling people as “weak” or “lacking willpower.”
We start asking:
What pain is this numbing?
What pattern is this reinforcing?
What support is missing?
Addiction thrives in isolation. Recovery thrives in connection.
Somewhere, there has to be a conscious decision to become mindful of what we are putting into our bodies — and why.


Not with judgment.
With curiosity.


My Truth
I am a caffeine addict.
I am nicotine dependent.
I am working on both.
And I have loved addicts.


Deeply.


We need to help one another make better choices instead of judging someone’s struggle. Because it could be you. It could be me. It could be someone you love.
Addiction is not a character flaw.


It is a condition.
It is treatable.
Recovery is possible.


And compassion? That should be non-negotiable