Tag: mindfulness

Shift Your Perspective: Transform Your Life Today

by Mothersense, posted in Uncategorized

Ever been in a room where everything felt a little off—too loud, too dark, too uncomfortable—only to realize later that it wasn’t the room, it was just where you were sitting?

Life is often like that.

Sometimes, we find ourselves stuck in frustration, fear, disappointment, or burnout. We look around and think, This situation is hopeless. This is never going to work. Nothing is changing. But maybe, just maybe, the problem isn’t the room—it’s our seat. Our perspective.

When we’re in the thick of a struggle, it’s easy to forget that what we see isn’t all there is. We mistake our limited view for the full picture, and we let that shape our choices, our emotions, even our identity. But a shift in perspective—like walking to the other side of the room—can transform not only how we see things but what we believe is possible.

As the writer Anaïs Nin once said, “We don’t see things as they are, we see them as we are.”

A Better Seat, A Better View

You’ve probably heard the phrase, “Change your mindset, change your life.” That’s not just a motivational quote—it’s a practical truth. When we step back, pause, and actively choose to look at our situation differently, new options begin to emerge. Where once we saw dead ends, we start to see doors. What felt like defeat now feels like a detour toward something better.

One of my favorite lesser-known reminders comes from author Mary Schmich:
“Don’t be reckless with other people’s hearts. Don’t put up with people who are reckless with yours.”
It’s a quote about boundaries—but it’s also about clarity. Sometimes, perspective is recognizing that the discomfort we’re feeling is a signal, not a sentence.

Perspective Doesn’t Deny Pain—It Reframes It

Let’s be clear: changing your perspective doesn’t mean ignoring reality or pretending things are okay when they’re not. It means being honest about your circumstances while also being open to seeing them through a different, more empowering lens.

Poet Mark Nepo captures this beautifully when he writes:
“To listen is to lean in, softly, with a willingness to be changed by what we hear.”
And that includes listening to ourselves—our stories, our patterns, our pain. Because sometimes, the shift in perspective comes not from looking out but from looking in.

How to Shift Your Perspective

Here are a few simple ways to change where you’re “sitting” in the moment:

  1. Zoom out. Imagine advising a friend who’s in your exact situation. What would you tell them?
  2. Seek contrast. Talk to someone with a totally different experience. Their viewpoint can shed light on angles you hadn’t considered.
  3. Ask better questions. Instead of “Why is this happening to me?” try “What is this trying to teach me?”
  4. Get physically moving. A walk, a drive, or just stepping outside can break the mental loop and bring clarity.

As the philosopher Epictetus said,
“It’s not what happens to you, but how you react to it that matters.”
Not flashy. Not romantic. But deeply true.

In the End…

Perspective won’t magically solve every problem, but it will change how you carry it. It will determine whether the weight breaks you down—or builds you up.

So the next time life feels impossible, unfair, or too heavy, ask yourself: Is it time to change seats?

Because sometimes, a new view is all it takes to do better—and be better.

Simple Steps to Cope When Life Becomes a Disaster

by Mothersense, posted in Messy Life, Uncategorized

When Your Life Is a Shitstorm: How to Pull Yourself Back from the Edge

You’re doomscrolling again. Your thumb moves, the screen refreshes, and more bad news floods in. It’s easier than thinking about your own life because, let’s face it, your life is a mess right now. Maybe it’s a slow, painful unraveling, or maybe everything collapsed at once. Either way, you’re here, trying to escape into the abyss of the internet, trying to feel something or nothing or anything other than what you are feeling right now.

First things first: Stop.

Not everything. Not forever. Just pause for a moment. Put the phone down, even if it’s just for a few seconds. You don’t have to fix everything right now. You don’t even have to do anything right now. But you do have to breathe. Not the automatic, shallow breathing that keeps you technically alive, but the kind where you take control of your own body again.

Breathe Like You Mean It

Breathe in deeply, slowly, deliberately. Feel the air fill your lungs. Hold it for a moment, then let it out. Do it again. And again. Because when everything feels out of control, this is the one thing you can control. You can’t change the past, you can’t predict the future, and you can’t force other people to act the way you want them to. But you can breathe, right now, in this moment.

Eat Something. No, Really.

Have you eaten today? No, coffee doesn’t count. Neither does the handful of crackers you barely noticed shoving into your mouth. Eat something real. It doesn’t have to be healthy. It just has to be food. A sandwich, a bowl of cereal, some fruit, even a damn granola bar—just something with actual calories and nutrients. When life is a wreck, basic self-care falls by the wayside, and eating is one of the first things to go. But you need fuel. You wouldn’t expect a car to run on an empty tank, so why are you expecting your body and mind to function when you haven’t given them anything to work with?

Drink Some Water. Yes, Right Now.

Dehydration sneaks up on you. It makes you foggy, sluggish, and more irritable. It messes with your mood and your ability to think clearly. And when you’re in crisis mode, drinking enough water is often the last thing on your mind. Grab a glass, a bottle, anything. It doesn’t have to be perfect. It doesn’t have to be lemon-infused or electrolyte-enhanced. Just drink.

Be Still.

This one is hard. We live in a world that screams at us to always be doing something, fixing something, achieving something. But when everything is a disaster, sometimes the best thing you can do is nothing. Be still. Let your body settle, let your mind settle. Give yourself permission to not have the answers, to not have a plan, to not know what comes next. Sometimes, the storm has to pass before you can even see the ground beneath your feet again.

Being still doesn’t mean you’re giving up. It means you’re letting your nervous system catch up, allowing your emotions to level out so that when you do move forward, you’re doing so with a clearer head and steadier hands.

You Are Still Here.

Life is not always fair. It is not always kind. Sometimes, it throws things at you that you never asked for and don’t deserve. But you are still here. And as long as you are here, you have choices. Maybe not the ones you wish you had, maybe not the ones that make everything magically better, but some choices.

Start with the small ones. The ones that remind you that you are, in fact, still in control of something. Breathe. Eat. Drink. Be still. And when you’re ready, take the next step. One moment, one breath, one tiny act of care at a time.

You’ve survived 100% of your worst days so far. You can survive this one too.

One of Those Days: Tips to Handle Life’s Challenges

by Mothersense, posted in Uncategorized

One of Those Mornings: When Everything Goes Wrong and It Just Hurts

We all have them—those mornings where nothing seems to go right, where life seems to pile up problem after problem before we’ve even had a sip of coffee. You wake up feeling just as awful as you did when you went to bed, and as the day begins to unfold, you start to wonder if the universe is testing you. Today is one of those days for me.

I woke up hurting. Not just a little ache here and there, but full-body pain—the kind that makes you question everything. Is it perimenopause creeping in? Arthritis? The remnants of a cold or even COVID? Who knows, but all I know is that I hurt. It’s one thing to wake up a little stiff, but this? This is a deep, unrelenting soreness that makes every movement feel like a struggle. I rolled out of bed hoping a hot shower might help, but little did I know what awaited me.

As I trudged through the house, trying to shake off the grogginess, I discovered yet another unwelcome surprise: a leak in the kids’ bathroom shower. And not just a little drip-drip situation—oh no, the copper pipe had split at a joint. The kind of plumbing disaster that instantly sends your heart racing, your brain spiraling through mental checklists of what to do next, and your wallet weeping before you’ve even picked up the phone to call a plumber.

And because, of course, bad things come in clusters, my son isn’t feeling great after his EGD and colonoscopy. The good news is that he’s not throwing up daily anymore, which is a huge relief, but he’s still not himself. I know it’ll take time for his body to heal, for things to regulate, for him to start feeling like himself again. But as a mother, waiting for that improvement is agonizing. We want to fix, to heal, to make things better instantly. Watching him go through discomfort, exhaustion, and lingering symptoms makes me feel powerless.

So, yeah. What a morning!

The Emotional Weight of “One of Those Days”

Mornings like these make you wonder how much a person can take. It’s like standing in the ocean during a storm, trying to brace yourself against wave after wave, just praying for a moment to catch your breath. But when everything hurts—physically, emotionally, and mentally—catching your breath feels impossible.

If you’ve ever had a day like this, you know what I mean. The kind of day where you start questioning if Mercury is in retrograde (again), if the full moon is messing with the energy of the universe, or if you somehow unknowingly offended the plumbing gods. The kind of day where you feel like you’re carrying the weight of the world on your shoulders, and all you want to do is crawl back into bed and try again tomorrow.

But life doesn’t work that way.

The shower still leaks, my son still needs care, my body still aches, and the world keeps spinning whether I feel up to it or not. So what do we do on these days? How do we keep going when everything feels heavy?

Everything Is Figure-Outable

One of my favorite mantras is, everything is figure-outable. It’s a reminder that even in the midst of chaos, there are solutions. The leak? It’s annoying, frustrating, and expensive, but it’s fixable. My body’s aches and pains? They may not have an immediate answer, but I can take steps toward finding out what’s going on. My son’s recovery? It’s a process, but healing is happening, even if it’s slower than I’d like.

When life throws these curveballs, it’s easy to spiral into frustration and despair. It’s tempting to sit in that space of “Why me? Why today?” And honestly, sometimes you just need to feel that frustration for a bit. But once you’ve allowed yourself that moment, you have to remind yourself that you’ve handled tough days before, and you’ll handle this one too.

Just Keep Swimming

Dory from Finding Nemo had it right—just keep swimming. Some days, that’s all we can do. Even when our bodies hurt, even when the to-do list feels insurmountable, even when we’re exhausted, overwhelmed, and ready to throw in the towel. One step at a time, one breath at a time, one small victory at a time.

On days like today, the victories might look different. Maybe the win is simply making that plumber appointment. Maybe it’s drinking an extra glass of water. Maybe it’s letting yourself rest without guilt. Maybe it’s calling a friend and venting for a bit. Whatever it is, no matter how small, it’s a step forward.

Finding Light in the Chaos

Even in the worst mornings, there’s always something to be grateful for. Today, I’m grateful that my son is showing some improvement, even if it’s slow. I’m grateful that I have the knowledge and resources to handle this plumbing mess. I’m grateful for a body that, while aching, still allows me to move, to get things done, to be present.

When everything feels overwhelming, gratitude is the anchor that keeps us grounded. It doesn’t erase the problems, but it shifts the focus, even if just for a moment. And sometimes, a moment is all we need to reset, to breathe, to remind ourselves that this day will pass, just like every other tough day we’ve faced before.

A Reminder to Be Kind to Yourself

If you’re having one of these mornings, I see you. I feel you. And I want to remind you to be kind to yourself. It’s okay if today isn’t productive. It’s okay if you need extra rest. It’s okay if all you accomplish is making it through the day. Some days are about thriving, but others are just about surviving—and both are okay.

So, to anyone else out there who’s having one of those mornings, let’s take a deep breath together. Let’s remind ourselves that we are strong, resilient, and capable. Let’s find a little light in the mess, a little humor in the madness, and a little grace for ourselves in the struggle.

Love and light, y’all. Keep going. Everything is figure-outable, and just keep swimming.

Finding Balance: Overcoming the Need to Constantly Achieve

by Mothersense, posted in Uncategorized

The Illusion of “Not Enough”:

Have you ever collapsed at the end of the day, feeling exhausted but still haunted by the thought that you didn’t do enough? Maybe you checked off multiple tasks, met deadlines, and even tackled a few extra chores, yet there’s a nagging voice whispering, You could have done more.

This feeling is so common, yet it’s rarely questioned. Why do we feel this way? Why does our brain insist on measuring our worth by how much we accomplish?

The Name for That Nagging Feeling

What you’re experiencing has a name: productivity guilt. It’s the psychological burden of feeling like you haven’t done enough, even when you’ve been productive. It often stems from a mix of societal pressure, personal expectations, and the ever-present hustle culture that tells us we should always be striving for more.

A close cousin of this feeling is imposter syndrome, where no matter how much you achieve, it never seems sufficient. Both can create a cycle of self-doubt, stress, and burnout—an exhausting loop where you’re never truly satisfied with your efforts.

Why Do We Feel This Way?

Our modern world thrives on output, measuring success in terms of productivity. We’re conditioned to believe that our value is tied to what we do, rather than who we are. Social media doesn’t help—scrolling through endless posts of people seemingly achieving more can fuel the belief that we’re falling behind.

But here’s the truth: you are not a machine. You are not meant to operate at peak efficiency all the time. Rest, slowness, and even unproductive days are part of being human.

Some Days Will Be This Way—And That’s Okay

Not every day will be a high-output day. Some days, your energy will be lower. Some days, your body or mind will demand rest. And some days, despite your best efforts, things just won’t go as planned.

That doesn’t mean you’ve failed. It means you’re living.

Be gentle with yourself. Progress isn’t about constant motion; it’s about balance. Your worth isn’t defined by how much you accomplish in a single day.

So, if today didn’t go as planned, take a deep breath. You are enough. You have done enough. And tomorrow is a new day.

Just a bad day, not a bad life

by Mothersense, posted in Uncategorized

When the Universe Feels Like It’s Conspiring Against You: How to Cope on Bad Days

We’ve all been there—one day, you’re on top of the world, ticking off tasks like a productivity machine, and the next day, it feels like the universe is suddenly conspiring against you. Nothing goes right, every little thing seems like a mountain, and you wonder how you’re supposed to keep moving forward. The thing is, bad days don’t mean a bad life. It’s easy to get stuck in that moment, but when the walls feel like they’re closing in, there are ways to navigate the storm.

Let’s go over a few simple but powerful ways to cope with those tough days, and remember, this too shall pass.

1. Breathe, Seriously. Breathe

When stress starts to mount and the weight of the world feels heavy on your shoulders, it’s natural to tighten up, hold your breath, or start breathing shallowly. But guess what? Breathing is a simple tool that’s always available to you, and it works wonders for resetting your mind and body.

Try this: Close your eyes, and take a deep breath in through your nose for a count of four, hold it for a count of four, then slowly release it through your mouth for a count of six. Do this for a few minutes. This simple breathing technique can help lower your heart rate, reduce anxiety, and give you a mental reset, allowing you to move forward with a clearer mind.

2. Be Gentle with Yourself

We often put so much pressure on ourselves to perform perfectly every single day, and when we don’t, it can feel like a personal failure. But here’s the thing: You are allowed to have bad days. Everyone has them. They don’t define you. Be gentle with yourself. Recognize that you’re doing the best you can in the moment, and sometimes, the most productive thing you can do is show yourself compassion.

If things aren’t going well, take a step back and say to yourself, “It’s okay to not be okay right now.” Give yourself permission to rest and take a break. Perfection is not the goal; progress is.

3. Take a Short Walk

If you’ve been sitting in one place for too long or your thoughts are racing, sometimes the best remedy is to get up and move. Even just a short walk outside—whether it’s around the block or in your backyard—can shift your energy. Nature has a grounding effect, and the rhythm of walking can help clear your mind and release pent-up tension.

If you’re stuck indoors, consider walking around your home or office for a few minutes. A change of scenery and some movement can be a small but effective way to reset your mind and shift your perspective.

4. Stretch It Out

Stress can manifest physically in our bodies. Tight shoulders, clenched jaws, and stiff necks are just a few signs that tension has taken root. A few simple stretches can help release some of that physical stress. Try doing some gentle neck rolls, shoulder shrugs, or standing stretches. If you’re able to, a quick yoga session can work wonders, focusing on stretches that open up your chest and relieve back tension.

The key here is to listen to your body—don’t push yourself too hard, but give yourself the space to release what’s no longer serving you.

5. Take a Mental Break

Sometimes, the most helpful thing you can do on a bad day is simply step away from the stressor, even if only for a few minutes. If you’re bogged down by work or a difficult situation, give yourself permission to take a mental break. Whether that’s stepping outside for fresh air, grabbing a cup of tea, or listening to some calming music, the break can help reset your mental state.

Remember, your productivity will often be much higher when you allow yourself to step away from the stress momentarily, rather than pushing through and exhausting yourself.

6. Reach Out for Support

Bad days don’t have to be faced alone. Sometimes, just talking to a friend, family member, or colleague can help alleviate the burden of a tough situation. Don’t hesitate to reach out when you’re feeling overwhelmed. Whether it’s venting or getting advice, a supportive conversation can bring a fresh perspective and remind you that you’re not in this alone.

7. Focus on What You Can Control

When everything feels out of your hands, it can be helpful to focus on the things you can control. Is there something small you can do right now that will help you feel more grounded or accomplished? Sometimes, taking just one step forward—whether it’s organizing your desk, finishing one small task, or even just drinking a glass of water—can give you a sense of agency and start to lift your mood.

8. End the Day with Gratitude

No matter how challenging the day has been, there’s always something to be grateful for. Before you go to bed, take a moment to reflect on what went well, however small it may be. Maybe you handled a difficult conversation, or you took the time to rest when you needed it. Remind yourself that even bad days are full of lessons and opportunities for growth.

Wrapping Up: Bad Day, Not a Bad Life

When it feels like the universe is working against you, take a deep breath, show yourself some compassion, and give yourself the gift of rest and perspective. Every day, no matter how hard, is a step forward. Bad days are just that—days—and they will pass. With small tools like breathing, stretching, walking, and focusing on what you can control, you can manage the stress and come out on the other side stronger.

Remember, this too shall pass. And on the days when it feels like you’re overwhelmed, remind yourself that a bad day does not define you. You’ve got this!