Tag: health

Christmas Togetherness: Embracing Love and Laughter

by Mothersense, posted in This Life

Christmas This Year

This Christmas season started off a bit heavy for me. I’ll be honest — I was sad for quite a bit, pretty much right up until our family’s Christmas Eve celebration.

That night, I sat at the end of the kitchen table and turned my head toward the living room as the littles opened their gifts. The sound that filled the house — the giggles, the pure laughter of children — there truly isn’t a better sound in the world. I teared up for a moment because that right there is exactly why I came.

I thought to myself, Mom and Daddy would be proud. They must be smiling down on us, because this—this togetherness, this joy—is all they ever wanted for us: to be together, to be present in each other’s lives, and to genuinely enjoy it.

Once the kids finished opening their gifts, it was the adults’ turn to shine as we mingled and prepared for our “Chinese Christmas” gift exchange. It was a blast — there were surprises, steals, laughter, and that wonderful mix of chaos and cheer that only family can create.

Then my sisters introduced a new game — one where you pass a gift left or right as a silly story is told, customized with everyone’s names. Each player put in a dollar, and a “Golden Ticket” prize would go to the winner, collecting the cash from everyone’s entry. It was silly and fun and full of laughter, just the way it should be.

My youngest got a few really thoughtful gifts this year, and at one point, he realized he only has two more years left of being “one of the kids.” That hit me — it made me pause and reflect. I have seven kids I call my own: five I gave birth to and two girls I’ve loved like my own for years. Four of them now have incredible partners — kind, caring, compassionate individuals who truly see who my children are and love them, flaws and all.

Even with a few behind-the-scenes hiccups (let’s just say there was a grocery order debacle, a brief moment of running out of gas, and yes, my husband losing his job), it was still a blessed Christmas.

Because at the end of the day, being surrounded by love, laughter, and the people who matter most — that’s what Christmas is all about.

Why Emotional Labor Deserves Recognition

by Mothersense, posted in This Life

The Cost of Being Unpaid

I often feel invisible. Not unseen in a dramatic way—but quietly, persistently taken for granted.

My empathy, my sympathy, my knowledge, and the countless things I offer other human beings move through the world without acknowledgment. I do not get paid to cook nourishing meals. I do not earn a wage for listening while someone vents, or for offering advice, or for helping untangle problems that aren’t mine. There is no paycheck for being available, for showing up emotionally, for holding space.

And yet, these things take time. They take energy. They take experience.

I have knowledge. I have lived enough life to understand nuance, to adapt, to learn quickly, to respond with compassion and clarity. I share all of it freely—especially with family. I give because I care, because connection matters to me, because helping feels natural. But because there is no monetary value attached to my time, no salary or hourly rate, it often feels as though my worth is somehow less.

Less than my sisters.
Less than anyone who earns money doing things.

I know—logically—that my skills have value. I know that emotional intelligence, adaptability, and lived experience are not insignificant. But where do they fit on a wage scale? What number do you assign to being the person others rely on? Why does value seem to exist only when it can be measured in dollars?

If I stopped doing all the things I normally do—if I were no longer available, no longer the listener, the helper, the cook, the steady presence—what then? Would the absence finally make the value visible? Or would it simply be filled by someone else, still unpaid, still unacknowledged?

Americans are relentlessly committed to monetizing every moment. A hobby can’t just be enjoyable—it has to become a side hustle. Creativity must be productive. Passion must be profitable. But a hobby stops being fun the moment it becomes a have to instead of a want to. When joy is turned into obligation, something essential is lost.

So I keep circling back to the same painful question:
If I am not valuable because I do not earn money… then what does that say about all the work that keeps people going but never appears on a balance sheet?

Maybe the problem isn’t my worth.
Maybe the problem is a system that only recognizes value when it can be billed, sold, or taxed.

And maybe being unpaid does not mean being unworthy—no matter how often the world makes it feel that way.

Low Flame, Big Impact: The Strength of Being Present

by Mothersense, posted in This Life

Blog Post: A Low Flame Still Lights the Dark

I haven’t wanted to do much of anything this week. Oh, I’ve done the bare minimum the best I can. I have pain. I have grief. I have things that need doing, and absolutely no motivation to do them. Showering, cooking, cleaning—those things get done, though some days I have to talk myself into each one.

I check in on my kids. It probably annoys them sometimes; I ask the same questions and get mostly the same answers. But I hope they know I’m here. I’m listening. I cheer for them silently, and I cover them in prayer every. single. day.

Right now, I’m in my mostly silent era. I’m being still, being quiet, trying to heal the parts of myself I don’t share with the world. I’m taking a beat to remember who I am, what I stand for, and how to stay present. Even if “present” looks like me half-asleep on the couch, waiting to welcome my daughter home after her trip to say goodbye to a friend who could no longer bear the weight of his pain.

I keep reminding myself that I am not expected to have all the answers. That others need grace and mercy. That the time and space I occupy matter—and simply being present matters.

Readers, when you come across this, and as you move through your day and all the days to come, please remember to be kind. You never know what battle someone else is carrying. I’ve studied world religions and belief systems, and one major tenet shows up in every single one: don’t be a jerk. Do good where you can. Help those who struggle. We have to be the light, even if sometimes we’re only a low flame.

Always,
Julie 🙂

Embracing Imperfection: Finding Grace in Struggle

by Mothersense, posted in This Life

I’m Letting You in on a Little Secret…

I’m going to let you guys in on a little secret: I do not have all of my ducks in a row!

Shocking, right? I know a little bit (or maybe a whole lot) about a great deal of things — cooking, baking, sautéing, homemaking, making money stretch — you name it. I’ve built real skills over the years, and I take pride in them. But even with all that knowledge, I still have those days. The ones that make me want to crawl back into bed and pull the covers over my head. The days that drag on so long and hard that I catch myself wishing the time away.

Yes, I know how to make money work for me, but I’ll be honest — once the needs are covered, I still struggle. Do I treat myself to something nice? Save it for later? Spend it on my kids? The internal debate is real.

I live with PTSD and anxiety. I get “blue” days — not what I’d call depression, but heavy enough that I feel it in my bones. I’ve seen true depression up close — in my children, in my ex-husband, in others I love — and it has taught me a lot about compassion, patience, and grace.

Some days, I’m full of energy and optimism, ready to take on the world. And other days… I’m lucky if I can get supper cooked. And that’s okay. I’ve learned that even with all my knowledge — about money, about mental health, about coping — some days just aren’t it.

On those days, I have to remind myself: give yourself grace. Say, “Enough. Be still. Rest.” You don’t have to do it all — especially today.

But here’s the tricky part: rest can easily turn into avoidance if we’re not careful. It’s important to recognize what’s going on and act accordingly. Listen to your instincts. Listen to your body. Rest when you need to — but also, when it’s time, get up and move.

Take the shower. Bake the bread. Step outside and touch grass.

We’re all learning in this life — every second, every day. We just have to keep showing up.

And if you ever feel like you fell short or owe someone an apology — do it, mean it, and move on. Know better, do better. Every. Single. Day.

Love and light,
💛 Julie

Conquer Financial Stress: Budgeting Strategies for Mental Wellness

by Mothersense, posted in financial-planning, This Life

Too Much Month at the End of Your Money? Let’s Fix That

Money stress hits hard — and not just your wallet. It weighs on your mind, affects your mood, and can make even simple decisions feel overwhelming. If you’ve ever found yourself staring at your bank account wondering how there’s still so much month left at the end of your money, you are not alone.

The truth is, financial strain can take a serious toll on your mental health. But with the right plan, some practical tools, and a little bit of grace, you can turn that stress into confidence and stability.

Step One: Understand Where Your Money Is Going

Before you can get ahead financially, you have to get real about where your money is going. Start by dividing your spending into two main categories:

✅ Needs

The essentials that keep you and your family safe and secure — food, housing, clothing, transportation, insurance, and healthcare.

💸 Wants

The things that add fun, convenience, or comfort — eating out, streaming subscriptions, impulse purchases, hobbies, or luxury items.

When you clearly see the difference between needs and wants, you can make smarter choices about where your money goes — without feeling deprived.

Step Two: Create a Flexible Financial Game Plan

A budget shouldn’t feel like a punishment. It’s a tool that helps you take control. And I can help you build one that actually works for your lifestyle.

Here’s how we can start:

  • 🍲 Budget-friendly meal ideas that taste great and stretch your grocery dollars.
  • 🛒 Meal planning and prep strategies to save you time (and reduce stress).
  • 📱 Smart grocery hacks — couponing, delivery services, and avoiding impulse buys.
  • 💰 Insurance and legal guidance, from understanding coverage to writing your will.
  • 🧓 Retirement planning, even if you feel “behind.”

And when life throws a curveball — like a surprise car repair or medical bill — your plan should be strong and flexible enough to adjust without derailing your progress.

Step Three: Protect Your Mental Health

Money stress can creep into every corner of your life if you let it. That’s why it’s so important to take care of you while you’re taking care of your finances.

Here are a few simple ways to stay grounded:

  • Take a walk and get some fresh air.
  • Try deep breathing or shoulder rolls to release tension.
  • Do yoga or stretch for a few minutes.
  • And yes — go outside barefoot and touch grass. It really does help.

For me personally, grocery delivery has been a sanity-saver. I avoid impulse buys, stick to my list, and save time and energy. The delivery fee? Totally worth it. Plus, meal planning keeps our household running smoothly — we rarely eat out, and rotating a few favorite meals keeps things simple and affordable.

Step Four: Give Yourself Grace

Financial change doesn’t happen overnight. It’s about progress, not perfection. Some weeks will go smoothly, and others will feel messy — and that’s okay. What matters is that you’re trying, learning, and adjusting along the way.

Remember: you don’t have to do this alone.

Let’s Take the Stress Out of Your Finances — Together

If you’re tired of feeling overwhelmed and ready to take control of your money and your mental health, I’m here to help.

Whether you need:

  • A custom budget plan that fits your life
  • Affordable meal ideas and grocery strategies
  • Guidance on insurance, legal, or retirement planning

…I’ve got you. Let’s work together to build a plan that gives you peace of mind and helps you breathe easier — financially and emotionally.

👉 Schedule a Consultation : Julie Kilcrease

JKILCREASE@primerica.com United States Texas : ‪(254) 677-7510‬