Realizations

Sept 8 2015
Today was the start of our homeschool co-op. Back to the “grind” so to speak but really it isn’t, it is just another day of routines. Except that on the night before I realized I had forgotten one of THE most important things I needed to handle…care for the hubs while we were out of the house for roughly 5 hours!! How did I forget such an important part of this new routine?? I just did. I frantically called my dear mother at 9:38 at night and asked if I could bring hubs over during the day tomorrow as the friend we would normally ask had another task he had to do. Well God’s grace washed over us because it all turned out ok. It worked out fine, but in that 15 minutes that I sat outside and bawled and felt so completely alone in this journey and like an utter failure for overlooking something that I should have KNOWN to take care of, I was miserable. I was miserable and alone and felt like I had let my husband down. (I hadn’t) AND I am not alone. I have people I encounter everyday via facebook or text and sometimes even in the Wal Mart parking lot that I speak to and I am happy to see and they are with me. They pray for me and my family. THEY are my village to whom I spead as much love and light as I can. Sometimes when I am physically alone I forget that so many are really THERE with me. We are in the trenches doing our damnedest to live our lives, and we may not speak every single day but we pray. We pray alone, in groups, in pairs, during Sunday service, we pray. And ladies and gentlemen it is only by the grace of God that I am still standing. Oh and that lovely email came, TANF was denied. We shall see how that works out for them because the reason we were denied assistance was asinine. I’ll get to that another day and another post. Tonight is about realizations.
I also realized tonight, as I did in fact encounter one of these Godly women in my village,that I have been delivered from so much pain in my past. I have overcome so many obstacles and that it wasn’t just ME who overcame, I had help. I had help from my mother who never has stopped praying for me. I had help from my sisters both blood and not who pray for me. I have had help from complete strangers who bless me with their prayers in groups and among those who see or hear about my journey. It is my journey y’all and Somedays almost want to give yp. I believe in miracles. I will walk this path and know that I am never alone, and neither are you! Love and light readers!! I am only a message away!