Spinning

I feel like things are spinning out of control. And as a mother at least some semblance of control is necessary to function in the day to day. My oldest is off to his trade school to work on an associate’s in diesel mechanics, seldom home. I was not prepared for that because he was such a momma’s boy for so long. I am grateful that he has come out of his shell and just cover him in prayer daily that he makes good choices. We have added a 17 year old to the mix last year (2013) and she is a fabulous kid who just needed a safe place to land for awhile until she has time to spread her wings as well. (*sigh* its so hard) And then the oldest daughter is finding her way in high school and flip flopping between “Mom fix this” and “Mom I’ve got this” all of that is enough to make some skiddish but not this faith driven, battle scarred mom. It does make me a tad dizzy as we walk a fine line with teens anyway, but these three, I just know they will manage to make a mark on the world, they have the heart for giving, and I love them for it. I certainly hope that they learn much sooner than I did to set boundaries before getting hurt too badly.

Flip down on the other end of my children and you have a 13 year old with all of her alphabet of difficulties who is doing marvelously well in a homeschool setting. This is her 8th grade year and she is doing a little bit of “feeling her oats” as the hormones have kicked in a tad and we are operating this year with NO MEDS, focusing our energies on coping strategies, breathing, manners, exercise and good nutrition (with some supplements). I finally managed to set her up for co-op classes. Its gotten off to a rough start but it is one day a week that she for sure gets to see friends and her classes are mainly science which she loves so she is doing well. Then we have the babygirl who declares herself the “normal one” just because she is my mini-me and that is so her personality!! She loves showing her FFA goats and is becoming quite opinionated but alas I know that inside that sweet little 10 year old girl there is a hormonal monster waiting to jump at me and be all emotional and I am just not ready yet. Finally we have the baby of all of my babies who has just turned 5, he is a little devil at times but mostly he is momma’s little sweetheart. He holds my hand, gives hugs freely, and lots of cuddles and kisses. And sadly those days will be gone much too quickly for my taste.

My world is spinning because I have 6 kids in my home and on bad days 7 because I sometimes include my husband as a kid too! (winky face – he knows) I love them all so much and fight so hard for them to have everything they need in the world and maybe spoil them just a tad too. And the holding pattern we may have been in for awhile, well it got smashed to pieces and now we are FULL SPEED AHEAD and really my babies are not babies anymore (BUT THEY WILL ALWAYS BE MY BABIES)..DISCLIAMER…I don’t have baby fever at all. I do not miss pregnancy or the middle of the night feedings, but dad gum I just wish that I had them for longer, its going by way too fast and soon I will be the grandma or grams or nana….I try not to think of that just yet because I just need to focus on NOW.Oh and the macaroni noodles I was boiling for lunch. Love and Light people – be good to YOU!!